the home stretch - remember to breathe

It's week freaking 12, people.

It seems like only yesterday we were sitting huddled in a circle with Di and Paul, tossing around ideas for characters and script-crafting.

And now we're here. Some of us have already filmed, other are just about to. My group falls into the latter category, but I'm kind of glad we chose to grad it out. Especially considering that no matter how much time you get in pre-production, you're always going to feel half-baked when you venture out on set.

This week's lecture was another Final Cut intensive. Timely, I must say, and it's nice to have it shown on the overhead so that we can get some kind of mental feel for the software. I swear that program has a level of complexity that not even I'm used to coping with.. argh. Anyway. It was good to learn how to insert text - we are reccommended to use the fade in/out technique as opposed to lame-o rolling credits. I think we'd have gone that option anyway, considering the feel we have chosen to embellish our piece with.

It's good to know, too, that we have options in post to make our film look spiffy, should some of it turn out underexposed or just plain droll. The formula Paul used went something along the lines of 'white whites, black blacks, saturation, softened edges' - sounds simple enough, but I swear it made a hell of a difference to the footage once the settings were applied. Just like magic :P

Grounded some of the basics once more, I think more than anything so as to solidify them in our skulls. Some key things to remember when shooting, and I think Robin summed this up nicely back in week 9: 'Sun is light and silence is still sound'. Omission is a very deliberate move in film - which is why post counts for so much.

a sneak preview of my pre-production

1 - mike's pipe, tv hits mag, tablecloth
2 - dull kitchen painting by request of jen
3 - gwen stefani - emo bedroom fodder
4 - fruit bowl, 2 oranges, 2 aprons, there's also a hairtie for the lou that isn't in the shot
5 - 2 x 2 placemats, one being of reverse phallic design (peaches, ahahahah *ahem*)
6 - marilyn monroe poster as per the script

Enjoy.

the inner shop-a-holic gets her fix

So this arfternoon, after work, I pretty much raided every Asian variety store in the Brunswick/Coburg area, scouting for the props that would best suit our quaint little production otherwise known as Potato Cakes.

And boy did I strike gold!

I can't wait to show the rest of the group the Monroe poster I found. I also got one of Gwen Stefani, looking hot and pouting accordingly, as well as a bunch of stuff for the kitchen, Lou's outfit, tacky shit that will come in useful on the day. I'm so proud of myself. AND it's all within out budget. Score! Got to love doing things the cheap and nasty way :P I think it has salient thematic connotations for our film as well, just quietly.

I gotta say, I am thoroughly enjoying this role right now. I've got such a clear idea in my head of how I want these sets to look, and how I want them to translate onto film. It's kind of phenomenal. I guess being this visually orientated is finally serving a productive purpose in my life. Can't say I haven't waited long to draw that conclusion! Point being, however, that if we don't nail the look and style of the film it isn't going to elicit the desired reaction from our audience... which in my view, is basically going to undermine the whole reason for making it. True?

Gonna get some pics of these babies up and running so all can see... ahh.

factoid

The human brain needs 2/25 of a second to process a cut (between scenes).

The things you take forgranted eh.

'when Godard zooms, you know it's a zoom'

I'm beginning to realise just how conscripting and formulaic filming drama really is. Even with just crafting the storyboard, for example, you are made painfully aware of what you can and cannot do as student filmmakers, especially when the look you are going for has a set of codes and conventions that aren't overtly experimental.

Every niggling little thing needs to be thought out. Every crash cut, jump cut, focus pull.. stuff like this you can't really afford to make up on the fly. And it makes sense now why doco and drama were swapped from one semester to another - I really can't imagine having to work within these confines for another 3 month block. But at the same time, it's probably better to get us used to this emulative approach so that once we do get around to making our own docos, we'll be much more likely to come up with something innovative.

In as much as we can, anyhow.

That aside, pre-prod seems to be running smoothly. No major hiccups, and now that everything is sorted, we seem to be on track. The only noteworthy difference is that instead of fiming this coming weekend, we'll be doing it the next. Which theoretically gives us less time in post, but more time to fine tune everything for our big day. Also, the equipment factor isn't really one we can get around. In a way I'm glad it's been pushed back, because it means our actors will get time to rehearse, and won't feel as though they've been thrown in the deep end.

Always be kind and accommodating to your actors. If there's a lesson that doesn't need learning by any of us, it's that.

the production designer: an integral part to the collaboration process

This post is purely for my own understanding of production design - but may contain something useful for any other people who may be presently undertaking a similar role:

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The term 'Production Designer' was coined in 1939 in respect to the work of William Cameron Menzies on the film Gone with the Wind, for the amount and calibre of design work he single-handedly accomplished on set. Previously, and often subsequently, the person(s) with the same responsibility had been called "art directors," but it is clear nowadays that this term is often both insufficient and inaccurate.

From early in pre-production, the production designer collaborates with the director and director of photography to establish the visual feel and specific aesthetic needs of the project. The production designer guides key personnel in other departments such as the costume designer, the key hair and make-up stylists, the special effects director and the locations manager (among others) to establish a unified visual appearance to the film.

Production Designers have one of the key creative roles in the creation of motion pictures and television. Working directly with the director and producer, they must select the settings and style to visually tell the story. They are the person ultimately responsible for the overall look of a filmed event.

Some of the crew who work in the art department under the production designer include: art director, assistant art director, set designer (draughtsman), set decorator, concept illustrator, graphic designer, model maker, although these roles can sometimes be interchangeable.

The set decorator, often someone with experience in interior decoration, finds decorative items for the sets such as furniture, wallpaper, knick-knacks and lighting fixtures. Working under the decorator are buyers, as well as a crew of set dressers who bring the items to the set, arrange furniture, hang curtains and “dress” the set.

A prop master coordinates with the production designer, but also works closely with the director and actors to provide the items handled directly by the actors such as newspapers, weapons, musical instruments and food. For the most part, the prop crew, along with an on-set dresser, maintain the integrity of the production designer’s vision during the shoot and manipulate the items for the camera.
[adapted from wikipedia.org]


Clearly, my role in Potato Cakes includes several components of 'art direction', none of which can really be simplified. However, Production Design is probably the closest summation we are going to find, as I dont think the term 'creative gopher' would resonate with too many folks out there... do you?

we've got out work cut out for us

So today's tute comprised of a viewing of all the Lennies, across all tutes, and I must say - in comparison to what some of the other groups put together - ours was ridiculously mediocre. Now, I still think I did the best I could with what footage we had.. but seriously, some people pulled off gorgeous ECUs and some beautifully crafted focus pulls.. yeah, some people completely crossed the line and filmed at different times of the day, which just looked weird. I guess the point of the exercise was to learn, but hot damn, I never realised how talented some of these media kids were. It's nice to see them all on top of their game.

With any luck, I'll be able to spend some time this weekend gathering the bits and pieces necessary for the girls' outfits. I'm talking accessories, makeup, hair bits.. the little stuff that all-too-often gets left to the last minute, or worse still, overlooked entirely. Even though it looks like we'll be using my house for the bedroom scene, we're still going to need fresh props for these guys. Got to be professionals here! Practice makes perfect... or so they say.

unedited notes on editing itself

So any Sopranos fan would have been in 7th heaven on my couch last night.

Mickey Blue eyes is a flatly linear narrative... not once is there a flashback, flashforward or memory sequence (the closest there is is a recurring snapshot of Mickey 'kissing' a ditzy blonde waitress). Each shot is constructed in a logical order. Many of the shots (esp at the beginning) are also rather long in duration - adding further to the one-dimensional feel of the movie, its fluidity and freely flowing capacity.

One very careful editing technique that stands out is the use of sound and the rhythmic ordering of shots to match its tempo. The film thrives on a seasoned buffet of alternately tense and jovial 80s Italian hit songs, not to mention a fair dash of romance thrown in for good measure. There are heavy uses of non-diegetic sounds, one in particular that stands out is the loud gong that introduces us to the Chinatown (fortune cookie proposal) scene. In fact, sound (and quite often, music) prefigures image in all of the location/scene transitions, suggesting a mood-oriented relationship between it and the film's visuals. There is one part where the music is even synched up with a series of gunshots, making for an rapidly unsettling sequence among the longer takes.

I found the shot-reverse shot sequence between Mickey and Gina's uncle to be particularly inlluminating. I love how the camera is angled looking down upon Mickey, whilst it points upward the uncle, an understood sign of the preeminence that longtime gang members these longtime gangsters were surrounded with. Think Citizen Kane on a smaller scale.

As for mise-en-scene, the smoke hovering above Gina and Mickey from her uncle's cigarette is a classic Hitchcockian prefigurement of their wedding day doom.. And, in the last five minute build-up toward the speeches, real time is utilised to heighten the sense of tension that is slowly erupting as Frank is expected to shoot his newly-pronounced son in law. For the most part, dialogue drowns out the rest of the sound, leaving an odd, lingering silence as the audience awaits the trigger being pulled. This is soon disrupted by a rather loud, abrupt turn of events that ends in momentary tragedy as Gina herself is shot..

Momentary, of course, because this is Hollywood, where restoration of love in imminent and a shiny resolution is unanimous. A highly entertaining watch, with a unique element of slapstick and darkness that one can only hope we are able to mimic to some extent in the coming weeks.

aced it.. all that worrying for nought?

Soo the TV1 exam I dreaded with great ominousness turned out to be rather.. simple in the end. I scored 54/54, which according to my calculations is PERFECT MARKS. hehe. Yay for getting that hurdle out of the way, and yay for being able to concentrate solely on pulling next week's production off.

We finalised our actors tonight, so everything seems to be falling into place nice and smoothly. It's such a headache though. Jen's done a fantastic job coordinating everyone and making sure we all have the contact details of the people we need. I'll be finalising wardrobe and costume over the weekend and buying the rest of the props, so things are definitely picking up in that department.

Must remember to bring my notes on genre as well. God there's so much to take in, I fear an early onset of senility creeping up on me.

Tonight I'm watching Mickey Blue Eyes (love my gangster/mobster flicks.. even the pseudo-British ones), so hopefully tomorrow I'll have some note-idge on the way editing is used within that narrative, and will find some way to incorporate that into our own drama. This is particularly timely as Latch will be finalising the storyboard so this sort of thing will need to be carefully considered early on.. I want as many details as possible to be sorted by the day of the shoot so that somehow, it all adds up in my mind to something frasible.

The countdown begins.

coasting.. on the upward gain

Friday's prac was probably one of the stand-out best pracs we've had all semester.

I got stuck right into it and actively did what I could to make my lesson in lighting count for as much as it could - And I have to say, I never did realise how complex a filmset could be - and how important it is to be precise (and safety smart) in getting these things set up.

There are several ways to skin a cat, I'm fast learning, but the key here is forethought. You don't want to have to spend oodles of time fiddling around with exposures when so much of that can be solved by making sure the lighting both is adequate and appropriate. Since we'll be shooting mostly in the evening, it's going to be interesting to see how we go with creating that subtle moodiness.. and not tripping over random shit in the process.

Again, you can never be too anal about safety.

I don't particularly wish to walk away with multiple bruises to my skull from hitting my head on a stand, or poking myself inappropriately with something.

That sounded kinkier than it really needed to. Time to get some of this pre-production shizzle happening, methinks.

...between a rock and a hard place

Is anyone else shitting their proverbials about the exam we're meant to be handing in next week?

I've been (albeit a good 5-10 minutes impunctually) to every lecture, prac, group gathering associated with this subject.. Read that freaking dossier from week to week and still, still cannot fathom how I'm expected to demonstrate my acquired 'knowledge' in an exam format... Unless we're talking in terms of safety precautions, or what button to press and when, or what to plug into where, which has been about the extent of it.

Seriously though, the whole assessment approach this course has taken is completely bizarre. I'm going to write a nice constructive response when the course evaluation surveys do the rounds in the coming weeks. This course could really have done with a Summer intensive to show students how to operate the technology PRIOR TO getting put into groups... Because it's not really fair to expect Paul and David to aid each and every one of us in our individual understandings of how the cameras and editing suites work. That's just not practical.

As a student, however, it's just so frustrating having to work with all this gear while pretty much clutching at the straws trying to get your head around it. I find this especially difficult being from Prof Comm, where movies are not my life 24/7. I thought the fact that I could appreciate communications more broadly would assist me in taking this course, but if anything it seems to have had the opposite effect.

Knowledge in philosophy, literature, drama, the classics, history and politics is what gives context to any media, for me, but I can't seem to find a level with anyone with a straight film bias. My HD in Broadcast means nothing because I can't translate any of that into what we're doing now - and it seems to be because of a) lack of one-on-one teaching and b) 2nd yr media clique culture. I feel stuck.

chop chop - and a smorgasboard of fresh ideas

Well, I probably couldn't have picked a better flick to apply the principles of yesterday's lecture to. Chopper makes some of the best and most deliberate use of lighting I've seen in a film since Gattaca (at least as far as modern films go), and has brought a lot to the table for our group to work with as far as organising our set for Potato Cakes is concerned.

The first half-hour or so of the film is shot within a prison set, so as you can imagine, there are plenty of tungsten lights and filters used to create a shady, gungey atmos that gives the viewer a sense of unease. The key lighting used is minimal, because the white walls refract most of it back into the space and onto the characters. During the more climactic moments, i.e. stabbings and brawls, the lighting has a tendency to become harsher, signifying an elevation in mood and adrenaline, similar to what the main characters are experiencing. Shadows, however, seem to follow Chopper wherever he goes - and with good reason. His jeckyll-and-hyde criminal persona plays out not only through the plot but via the careful use of mise-en-scene. Below, pictured with his girlfriend 'Tanya', you can see the way lighting has been manipulated to always keep some part of his face out of view:



This either suggests that he is constantly hiding something, or there is some dark part of his personality that cannot be revealed. Perhaps both. Throughout the film, there are several scenes filmed in the dark that seem to add to the overall insidious feel of the piece. However, some of the artier non-plot events or sequences that operate inside Chopper's mind employ some very contrasting lighting techniques - bright, cabaret-style lighting, blinding bulbs, in-your-face sort of stuff to jar ones own consciousness. I wish I could get some of my own stills happening so ya'll could see what I'm talking about. Bana's performance is flawless, and it's well worth a look for those who are keen on indulging in a hearty slice of Aussie gangster culture. Pretty gory in parts, but worth watching for its technical innovation.

Back to Potato Cakes - we've decided we want to make this more of a 'dark' comedic take on dysfunctional Australian family culture, so a lot of our cinematography will be relying upon similar lighting set-ups. To begin with, we're also filming at night, which means the fine line between dull mood lighting and being too dark is something we'll have to be constantly mindful of. We don't want to cross over into the abyss of shooting poor quality footage when in reality the flick of a switch and some careful angles could have added ten thousand times more meaning to a scene... Need to discuss this one with the guys, but I'm going to suggest that we have at least one red head spare in case we run into the problem of 'dead space'. Tbe last thing we want is poorly lit shots that offer nothing in the way of subliminal fodder... I guess that's where my role as Production Designer becomes important, because I can afford to take note of this stuff while the others do the more 'hands on' kinds of roles. Hmm.

Going to go and work on some character stuff now. Fingers crossed Jen gets back to me with some actor profiles to trawl through.

all lennied out

Well, I spent a good hour and a half tonight editing lenny down to about a minute and making the best of the footage we shot last week. Luckily no-one had touched it since, so I got to navigate my way around FCP a little more and work some of that post- magic again... I've gotta say, every time I get into post I'm reminded of why I chose this major. That sense of achievement that washes over you once you've effectively created something somehow makes the rest of the bollocksing around worth sticking out (hey, you've gotta get your rocks off somewhere).

Impressively, the sound was probably the best aspect of the entire exercise - and given that it was my first time being technically responsible for that on shoot, I was pretty stoked. Unfortunately you can see the boom in one of the shot sequences, and on the whole the shots themselves are fairly bland (dir/DOP didn't heed my advice on getting in some angled close-ups, which would have made a huge difference, visually).

Thus I pretty much did what I could for visual continuity - there are some very complex movements of Lenny's that I worked hard to match up, i.e. when she crosses her legs after sitting down, and when she gets up to make a getaway from Ms Sargeant... little things, but important things nonetheless. It's amazing just how much of a difference trimming one frame here and there can make when you're attempting to convey a simple narrative. I wish we'd have organised some time out of class to film it so that it wouldn't have become such a rush job - but that's the nature of the beast at this stage and I can only hope this makes us more determined to be thorough when it comes to filming Potato Cakes. Cause we'll be inconveniencing a hell of a lot more people next time round if we don't get it right. meh.

Interesting (& elongated) lecture on lighting this morning - we learnt of key/fill/hard/soft lights, when to use them and how practical they are. Also, they tried to play us a bit of The Sweet Smell of Success, but the dialogue came up in German, much to everyone's amusement. But why do we light? 'To achieve temporal continuity' (visual, spatial). I'm going to watch Chopper now, so will update later or possibly tomorrow with reference to what we discussed.

peace.

fine tuning, more for my sake than anyone elses

I need somewhere to store this list, and here seems to be the most appropriate.

Things I need to finalise in the next week:

Costumes - mostly for Alice. Once we've picked and actor and I know her body type I can find exactly what I'm looking for. Will be aiming for the pseudo-goth look though, so the black and fluro pink nail polish will be coming out of the vault. Watch out!

Set design - I need to get my hands on a bland checked tablecloth, preferably of the green variety, to match the funky art deco ovens in our beloved kitchen. Somehow want to incorporate that pet budgie into the mix, but fear I'm becoming too adventurous for my own good :P

Props - I'm trying to think of new and inventive ways to incorporate boob-like imagery into the shots.. Nothing like a bit of tongue in cheek (and if Hitchcock can get away will phallic symbolism, then we can do the reverse!).. Might invest in a cheap fruit bowl and some well-rounded apples.. or peaches if you're that way inclined.. haha.

I'm sure there were more things. No doubt they'll come to mind when I hit 'publish'.

I'm kind of crabby that work won't give me the time off to come to this weeks castings.. But if I'm not earning cash, I'm not gonna be able to buy all of this stuff, and it's no secret that a production designer's is probably the most financially demanding - because when I visualise what I want, only I can really go about getting it. I just wish the same went for an endless pile of money...

what a scene

Today was a barrel of laughs. Two dead batteries (both for the sound box AND battery box), loss of script and loss of actors who had to leave at 1:30 for their respective classed. Dramas, dramas, is there something about the genre that to some extent effects the nature of the job? I wonder. Despite being sabotaged, though, it seems to have gone alright. I suppose I'll have a better idea once I see the footage uploaded in post.

We ended up with two female actors - one brunette whose name I can't remember, and a girl named Elanore who played Lenny (ironically, her nickname actually is Lenny.. haha.. serendipity perhaps?). I think it worked better with women to be honest, but I'm scared we might've overlooked something as we didn't have a copy of the original script to work off.. I swear losing my lecture notebook has thrown me completely off kilter with this subject. Freaking pain in the rear is what it is.

Kudos to Latch for bringing along the storyboard. Although, it would have been better to see a bigger variety of shots to work with as opposed to more of the same, unimaginative mid-shot type stuff. The camera movement was good though, and I was pleased we managed to incorporate a fresh setting that no other students would have chosen.

I felt pretty daft being responsible for sound, but I learnt a hell of a lot about the technical side of things, even just sending signals and stuff to the camera to try and get the correct levels. No doubt it will take a few more goes before I can confidently say 'I know what I'm doing', but it was nice nevertheless to step outside of the visual role and just focus upon the audibility of something... Like ordering lemonade instead of Coke or any equivalent switch in default choice.

We have heaps to organise for PC this weekend. I've burnt copies of the shots we took last week for the boys, so at least we'll have something to model our storyboard off. Good times.

the early bird gets the worm... or the grab

The filming of the PR breakfast with Josh and Ed of 3rd yr Media went well yesterday... Woke up at the bitchin' hour of 5:30am in order to haul arse to Spring St by 6:15. I wasn't in the best of moods. The other stress-addled folk only seemed to exacerbate this, but by 7am we were all systems go and had been given the green light to tuck into our Continental (ha ha) breakfasts, so things weren't all gloom. In fact the day itself turned out to be lovely - sunny even - and it was a delight to work with two guys who had the levels of experience that those two did.

I actually didn't feel out of place not knowing as much as them.. I just paid attention and asked as many questions as I could. It was nice feeling welcomed into unfamiliar territory, as I was initially quite worried about how the events would transpire (and consequently, how much shit we'd end up in if we buggered anything up). It was my first time getting to work with radio mics, so I found that particularly useful from a technical perspective.

For most of the morning I was responsible for taking the still shots, which I've already burnt onto disc to give to Carey when I go in for tomorrow's prac. Josh did the bulk of the filming, and I take my hat off to him for putting in such a fine effort. Though I wonder how that Tim Flanney story ended up in the news? There were more journos present than you could sink a ship with, but from what I could tell there were no other film crews. It'd be bloody exciting if the work of us lowly students was unwittingly broadcast on national TV, dontcha think?

In short, I'm really glad I volunteered to do this. I'm slowly building up enough confidence to be able to tackle the technical side of things and thus contribute something meaningful to the overall production process. You know what they say - one step at a time.

i <3 suburbia

Nestled somewhere within the quaint greenery of melbourne's inner South East lays a charming brick veneer home that will become the location for my group's TV1 project.

We met up yesterday afternoon at said location, in Orange St East Bentleigh, and each pretty much fell instantly in love with its rustic appeal (you should see the old-style green oven.. it's TO DIE FOR). The backyard is a bit shabby, I'm trying to convice the others that it makes for a crap establishing shot and we ought to be focusing more on Alice. Other than that though we have good access and most of what we need is already there, we'll just need to organise/prepare the food and figure out a way of doing the plate smashing So we've got that sorted. I brought along my digital camera and we took a few snaps to help piece together the storyboard. Will burn those onto disc/memory stick so everyone else has a copy for their perusal.

I've already started gathering props for our characters. Bought a $4 pipe for Mike the other day, and am hunting around for a grandpa hat as we speak. Found a 'desperate housewife' apron for Lou as well - utter gold. Will be gathering emo-style posters to make one of the bedrooms look more like a girl's room.. might throw in a bit of Leonardo di Caprio for good measure as well :P

On that note, I'm going to finish watching the rest of The Departed now.

saboteurs, ye be ware

Didn't end up filming in the pracs today... Instead, we practised setting up from scratch (mind you our kit had some of the shonkiest cord etiquette I've EVER seen) and spent the second half doing a mock-Lenny shoot as a class. I then proceeded to make a royal ass of myself as impromptu camera op, cementing the age-old belief that us Prof Commers are the resident incapable twats of bulding 6. Haha.. arrhhg, such embarrassment. To be honest my fear and loathing of the apparatus surprised even me... I mean, am I wrong to be overwhelmed by $20,000 worth of gear? I'm a pretty paranoid person as it is, and you can bet your bottom dollar that even the mildest scare tactics work with me where expensive gear is concerned. Sigh. At least I've managed to memorise all the little on-set catch phrases, and in their correct order no less.

Location scouting this weekend. Hopefully that'll be a more fortuitous endeavour. I really, really, really want to find a way to invest my energy into this project to make it worthwhile. Really.

tail wind's a long way off

Tomorrow we begin filming for Lenny.
I'm rather apprehensive about this, because last night's meeting revolved around tieing up loose ends with our drama script (we ended up choosing Potato Cakes, YESS!) rather than getting a storyboard together for tomorrrow. So with any luck we won't fail and will hopefully be able to shoot as per the notes we made in class last week... Only problem is, Jen isn't going to be around for the next few pracs and I've MISPLACED my TV1 notebook. I don't think this semester could be any more of a shambles if it tried... and I have a feeling this head wind won't subside anytime soon... argh.

Despite my best efforts to become more of a presence in this so-called 'group' project, I've pretty much landed the most minor role possible: Production Design. I'm not going to pretend to be happy with this, but seeing as the decision had been made prior to my consultation, there's not exactly a lot of choice. Yeah, I'm annoyed that my talent and enthusiasm aren't going to be utilised to their full extent. But at the same time, I'm too over this project to really let it get to me. What started out as the highlight of my year has quickly become the biggest anti-climax... I don't know if it's the way these classes are structured or what, but lately all I seem to be feeling is either completely petrified about filming or totally out of place in all my non-media degree glory.

It's probably not a good idea to be going on about this here, so I'll just put a lid on it for now. On the plus side, nothing can affect my love for this medium, so I know I'll always put 110% into anything with my name attached to it. I guess I just wanted my last year of undergrad to stand for more, you know? I wanted to push my own limits and capabilities and take complete ownership of something, like I did with Broadcast, but it doesn't look like I'm going to get that chance. I guess all there really is left to focus on is honing my own skills and understanding to try and get as much out of this as I can. I want to walk into next semester with the confidence to assert my beliefs... Just got to pull through this first.

affirmation

They say it's the little things that keep you going - and I can definitely attest to this. Matt Fitz complimented my script this morning and it just felt like the biggest wave of relief... maybe it's a Prof Comm thing where we're all helping to keep each other's heads above water.. I don't know. But knowing someone read it and didn't feel like they'd just wasted their time was somehow enough for me. A glimmer of hope that I've got something to offer to this industry, something real.

Will update more later. In between class and due to have a test. Good times, good times.

opportunity knocks

I found out today that I didn't get the PR job I applied for. Apparently I was at the top of the ranks until a girl who's graduating this semester had her interview, so it turned out her availability was more ideal. I'm not entirely bothered by this - if anything it means less chaos on my end as I won't have to juggle my set hours at the bank with being on-call - and it means I can be more directive with my degree and the focus I wish to take with it.

I've always been somewhat torn between the two quite divergent disciplines of PR and Media Production. Majoring in both has been pretty full-on at both ends, and my reasons for enjoying them have been radically different. With PR it's had more to do with my desire to become a better communicator through the practice of writing and theorising - whereas with production it's been purely a matter of creative release, as instinctual as breathing and just as necessary. I have a few theories about serendipity, and I think the fact that I missed out on this job is suggesting that I get my priorities straight. I have the chance now to settle for good on the goal of working in production instead of getting sidetracked with what is basically a hobby over a passion... It's exciting, but a little daunting - I always like to have a back-up plan, but that kind of seems like a cop-out when we're talking in terms of life ambitions and dreams...

I'm pulling myself up on yet another introspective rant. My bad.

Next week I'm helping film the PR breakfast (ironic, eh) with Ed and Josh from 3rd year Media - should be good, although we've gotta rock up to the Windsor at some ridiculous hour like 6:30am... The free breakky had better be worth it!

Production meeting in about 20 minutes. Fingers crossed we'll have decided our roles, scripts, and formulated some plan of action for Friday's class. I wish our schedules were coordinated a little better so we didn't have to wait around for each other, but so it goes with these things. Daresay I'll be considerably less antsy once we've actually chosen a script...

scorsese = god

I bought The Departed on DVD today :D I'd been meaning to go to JB Hifi for ages, I've had $70 worth of vouchers sitting around since my birthday (read: SEPTEMBER last year), so figured this little venture was long overdue.

But perhaps even more exciting than adding another of my favourite titles to the swag was the bonus CD to come with it - Scorsese on Scorsese. The man on the man! I'm so excited I'm practically wetting myself. This is definitely being fast-tracked to the top of the must-see pile before the group gets on location and starts to film.

The man is more than an inspiration. He is a divine entity unto himself.

scripts

it is going to take me ten thousand years to read through bloody all of 'em.

black friday

I had a swag of assessment due today, one piece of which will have to be handed in on Monday. Joy.

We've begun visualising for our Lenny exercises, which is proving to be somewhat interesting. There are so many different ways to go about this, but somehow I can picture all of ours looking the same if you know what I mean. To be honest I think everyone's starting to become too wrapped up in their individual projects to really put a lot of constructive thought into making Lenny a success... but it'll be good nonetheless to go through the mini-motions of a production project in order to fine tune ourselves for the real deal.

I'm tempted to suggest we rip off the Hitchcockian idea of introducing our two characters via their shoes. Anyone who's seen Strangers on A Train will know what I'm talking about (Bruno/Guy are contrasted via the sorts of shoes they are wearing and the direction in which they are walking, as well as the steps of their feet and the music that accompanies each.. ah, good times they were, good times). Hopefully we can all work out a time we're free this week to get this show on the road.. the sooner we can knock off smaller stuff like Lenny, the more energy we'll have to concentrate on other, more pertinent stuff.

should have put this up before, but it deserves a place

[concept]
“…you can’t blame either of them for leaving me to rot like this”


Fiend is a short film that deals explicitly with the intense psychological conflict surrounding chemical addiction. Following on from the dramatic themes touched upon in Crank (2006) and Spun (2002), the film explores the insidious nature of substance abuse – notably, of the prolific street drug "ice" (methamphetamine). Peering beyond the realm of Melbourne's social castes, the film centres around the zombie-like existence of a young man on a seeming-downward spiral. As he tries to grapple with the death of his mother, a failed relationship and a financially debilitating speed habit, Arty's world is thrown off balance as he questions his ability to live with himself – whoever that might be. Unable to reconcile his ‘inner’ persona with the ‘bright and shiny’ euphoria wrought by the drug, he embarks on a confronting quest to find his way back to self-acceptance. In so doing, Fiend examines and rejects popular conceptions of reality, faith, and humanity, while offering solace in the enigmatic beauty of art and cinema.

[/end concept]

Also, getting a start on next week's readings. That dossier is one fat little comprehensive sumbitch. No-one can say they weren't advised on how to do anything! The emphasis on group work is a little jarring, but necessary all the same. Got to get out of solo-mode at some stage, I just wish I knew more folks who had gone into the telly stream. Damn you all for going over to the dark side(s)! We'll show 'em.. we'll show 'em up good.

contextualising my appreciation...

Just a random thought I had...

I remember being asked in Week 1, what my favourite film was. I answered, in earnest, The Prestige.

It's hard for me because a favourite film, to me, just classes as the one that has most recently inspired or evoked some kind of affirmation in you that the path your headed down is absolutely the right one.

Basically, when I watch a film, what I'm really looking for (above all else) is a sense of conviction. I need that to be sure of what I'm doing.

While it does have many complex layers, what really made the film for me was structuring of time and cause and effect. Without these two things, a film cannot truly succeed as a film... it becomes linear, boring, obtuse.

The world needs more directors like Christopher Nolan.

And for now I need sleep...

good friday.. good times?

So we're officially 'on a break'. It really doesn't feel like we should be. I don't feel like I've covered sufficient enough ground to have earnt a break from uni, but I'd best use this time wisely while I've got it, hey.

I like how we're being taught all different facets of the production roles. This week had a particularly good reading, entitled 'The Director and the Actor', and I guess having never made a real drama before (only ever did some stage when I was younger), I never really pictured myself having to realise my vision of a role through someone else. It's so fascinating and complex, one can't help but be taken by it all. If I get to direct at some stage this year, I guess I'll see for myself what it's like to have wear that all-important hat.

Sigh. Can't wait to read other peoples' scripts. I want to know what they came up with. In some sense it would have been good to read a few more before handing mine in (the only one I got to read was Latch's, 'cause he asked me to out loud in class). Ah well. Something to look forward to I guess.

I'm in the (rare) mood for a trashy horror film. Any takers?

'...it gets to a point where it's very ego-centered'

That's a direct quote from Scorsese in the first of this week's readings.

He's talking in relation to longer takes, and how some of the directing greats utilised them to their advantage. I guess he's right - this sort of profession has a certain kind of ego-magnestism to it - especially when so very many of us are at the mercy of our idols. I'm thinking, though, that in order to be honest in the way you make films, you need to be able to trust your own instincts. You have to be open to compromising some of your initial preconceptions.

'Even if there was a certain look on his face, I'd rather cut into that shot for (it)'.

So much of what happens on set is not pre-meditated, and some of it's not necessarily bad. For example, when an actor improvises a certain phrase or line, or gives a word a different inflection... it can change the emotional tone of an entire scene, and thus affect the framing, filming and overall mood. I like to think that while you can never really plan enough, and that all forms of pre-production are 100% necessary, you're not 100% required to stick to your shot lists on the day of the shoot. You can't really afford to set things in stone when so much of what you do is causal.. and we know how unpredictable (and at times, unreliable) people can be.

Scorsese also suggests that creativity and creative interest goes beyond the realm of 'talent' and becomes more a matter of instinct:
'Where I set the camera is just something I feel'.

And we feel it, too.

we could all do with some theatrics

..to brighten the day.

David's lecture this morning was an absolute doozie. I love having my 6 hours of straight classes brightened by the nutso antics of my peers, namely Latch, whose ridiculously dispassioned performance might've helped demonstrat what to film - but certainly not how not to act. Gold.

We're coming up to break time now so with any luck we'll all be able to get out acts and our heads together enough to prepare ourselves for the ride the rest of this semester is going to be. I've got that much to do it isn't funny. I should probably be in bed now, but will have something more meaningful to contribute tomorrow when I've done the rest of the readings.

nighty night.

april fool's day

We're now a quarter of the way through the year, folks. Clap clap, the best is over, brace yourselves for the terror that is yet to come.

Also, the census date has passed which means there's no backing out now.

one down, and about fifty five billion to go

I've completed my script, but there are parts of it I want to change before I shoot it off. I'm glad to have made it through the whole onerous process, but at the same time, it feels like the biggest anticlimax - as in, where to from here? I guess the worst bit is not knowing whether they'll get made, and not being able to have a lot of input into the production of your own script. I know this has to be done for a reason, but it's the first time for many of us to be put in this position, and I just find the uncertainty of it a little uninspiring. I'm sure once groups are formulated and we get our own production balls rolling, things will fall into place.

It's starting to eke closer, as much resistance as time has yielded in passing. This week's readings go into detail about light balance, how to focus a camera, all kinds of other delectable technicalities that will come in useful in the near future. I'm itching to get back into it, though.. to be honest. It's been far too long.


And now to change this bloody ending. I can't decide whether it's more difficult to begin a script or to suspend it. They both do my head in.

time's a tickin'

So our scripts are due on Monday. Mine's about half-way done, so about 90 seconds left to go. I never dreamed one would need to muster so much energy to get three minutes' worth of film onto paper! Deceptively difficult, that one.

Still, I'm having a hell of a lot of fun crafting Fiend, particularly the voice-overs of Art himself. The character is really beginning to grow on me. I wonder if this is a natural part of the scriptwriting process? Do writers form curious bonds with the little imaginary fragments they breathe into life, or am I just uncessarily sentimental about these things??

In my mind I have a vision of a very experimental, sound-driven narrative. I want the audience to get inside this guy's head, to feel and experience the smacked-out delirium that had overtaken his world. The disorientation associated with a come-down is like a metaphor to mirror his fall from grace... from humanity, from himself. Though being the overwhelming optimist I am, I can't let it simply be a reflection based on that fact. There needs to be change, there needs to be movement. Characters must be fluid, as all humans are.

I'll bring him round full circle, but I won't lead him the entire way. Change is in the hands of the individual. Still tossing up a few motif ideas in my head, but I daresay there'll be a jehova's witnesses encounter somewhere along the lines - just ot keep life interesting of course :P

Watch this space.

nature of the beast: learning the ropes in cinematography

Today's hour of power was spent brushing up on what, by now, ought to be a given/second nature for many of us, but it certainly can't hurt to reiterate the basics at this point in time.

The nature of the camera has a large impact on the way films are shot, as it has a direct correlation to the nature of the frame. These composition choices need to be clearly thought out from the very beginning, so that mise en scene can be taken care of accordingly.

We are lucky in that the cameras we are using have viewfinders. Apparently a feature was shot on someone's mobile phone last year - I can only imagine how much of a headache it's going to be to edit something of that quality, but hey, it's a world-first and the technology makes it possible in this day and age.

The aspect ratio of a frame should always be used to its full potential. We can opt to shoot in 16x9 as opposed to the native 4x3, if stylistically this will add specific meaning to the narrative. The key to always ask oneself is how much are your shots going to reveal? How flat do you want the frames to be? Remember, the frame is NOT reality, i.e. cheating is permissible.

Godard commented on the nature of watching (audiences), whilst watching a film. The idea is to make viewers forget that they are, in fact, being engaged - that is, to sublimate their senses without becoming overbearing. The sky may be the limit with character, but from a technical perspective, everything must serve a purpose. Once people remember that they are watching a film, it loses any lasting impact it could have had on them, making it moot.

There's one hell of a fine line between theory and practice - will any of dare to cross it this semester?

conceding defeat

Well, I've given up and given in to some extent on trying to get WordPress to be my friend. I figure that if I do get it up and running I can just set it up to feed straight from here anyway, so that's that.

This morning's lecture gave me a lot to think about regarding how I want my script to be shot. I hadn't really given it a great deal of thought prior, but the aspect ratio used to film with can make an enormous difference to the narrative structure. A film like Apocalypse Now, for example, would not have had such an oblique, end-of-days feel to it had it been done on 3:4 or even 16:9. Its very structure and cinematic dexterity is heavily reliant upon the inclusion of the wide-wide screen, and Coppola's meticulous attention to detail is enough to awe the pants off generations of audiences, 28 years on from its release.

It's funny to think that movies were awesome well before I was born.

(No, I'm not an ageist, damnit!)

I'm thinking 3:4 might be the go with mine, but we'll see. I've flirted with the idea of 16:9 but honestly, I think it's probably best to stick to convention - at least for the purposes of this task and the genre it pertains to. I have thought about filming in black and white though, not just for the memory sequence, but the entire piece. Hmmm. We'll see what transpires when I finish the script.

Speaking of which... I'd better get on it - while I've still got energy (and motivation).

metamorphosis

I want to get inside this character's head. How would I feel if the closest thing to living was having methamphetamine coarsing through my veins? When did blood cease to be enough to sustain a human being?

I'm basing this story partially on two people I know. One (M) is a recovered meth addict, the other (J) is a current crack addict. The latter I would consider quite a good friend. The age group is similar, but scenario here is totally different - both of these people I know via the melbourne queer scene - but the principle still stands. Though it wouldn't really occur to me to broach the subject (the term deaf ears springs to mind), I do hope that, eventually, he finds a reason to rid himself of his crackpipe, of his own will.

Maybe I'm trying to personify courage. I don't know. I'm trying to put into a metaphor what is impossible for me to conjure up into my verbal interactions with the world. I've seen drugs do some nasty shit to people, their relationships, their interactions with the everyday world, and most of all themselves. The fact that most of them live in denial scares me. 'Creatures of habit' takes on a whole new meaning when one of your 'friends' goes through a good $100/day of crystallised cocaine.

I understand the desire to want to put a barrier between yourself and your emotions. But it's a depressing way of life and a degenerative one if you let it control you. I'm 21 and already I can see this... does that mean I can make a difference?

flickerfest 2007 - opening night

Last night I ventured out with a good mate to KinoDendy cinemas in Collins St, to catch the Opening Night of Flickerfest. Currently in its 16th year running, Flickerfest is Australia's most competitive International short film festival. For $14 apiece we were treated to a swag of award-winning films from around the world, varying anywhere from 6-20 minutes in length - not to mention the catered (booze included) afterparty, where they served up these gorgeous little lamb cutlets with pomegranite seeds on top.

Pretty swish, eh?
You'd better believe it.

We actually sat in front of Christine Rogers, the old Prof Comm admin officer and my tutor from Writing Media Texts last year. The film she was invoved with didn't make the cut for the Melbourne screening, but apparently she'll be working on some bigger and better things in the UK and LA next month. It's always good to see Melbournians heading off into the big smoke... unfortunately, we missed our chance to talk with the two directors of the Melbourne short that's on everyone's lips at the moment, Booth Story. Shortly before the screening, Kassimir Burgess and Edwin McGill gave a quick thank you speech, which I probably would have appreciated more if I'd known how good the film was going to be.

Brilliant stuff. I gave an incoherent, gushing review in the tute today, which probably didn't articulate any good reasons why my fellow students ought to suss this film out, only that it would have them rolling in the aisles and send shockwaves of patriotism down their spines. I guess clever, local cinema always takes me by surprise.

They were all pretty good though. Another stand-out effort was 'Dreams and Desires', which gets double points for originality.. Who'd have thought to rip off dodgy home-made camcorder footage in the style of animation? Really understated yet really effective. My lack of innovation really depresses me when I watch this sort of stuff.

Hoping to get along to tomorrow or Sunday's screenings, but can't foresee having the extra time or money to do so. Bah humbug.

research: ABC/Four Corners' 'The Ice Age'

[This is what I just watched]
'A shocking close-up study of the new drug of choice: ice'

I guess it had to be done in order for me to understand what I'm getting myself into.. as far as my leading man is concerned. but fuck. Some of that doco is just purely and utterly disturbing. And there really is no other way of putting it.

I guess it's difficult to remain truly objective in the face of an illicit addiction. It is also very hard to rationalise that kind of thing, and the sorts of people they use on their programs really typecase addicts in a way that I don't agree with. Why do they scour the streets until they find the most derelict individuals with children they cannot name and cardboard boxes for homes? That is so disturbingly inaccurate of Australian drug culture it isn't funny.

Most of these addicts have jobs, lives, and friends that they try to hold down, while most of their suffering happens in private. That is the side I want to expose - the boy(or girl)-next-door aspect that gets overlooked in favour of what society deems palatable. If 'people' really knew what went on behind their neighbours' closed doors, they mightn't be such a judgemental mob. Because I know for a fact that drugs are *that* imminent.

It isn't always the junkie sleeping in the cardboard box whose life has been reduced to next-to-nothing.

Damn representation shits me sometimes. I'm going to have so much fun next semester ripping these freaking docos apart. Still, at least now I have some proper food for thought.

'the art of ventriloquism'

So today's lecture moved onto the technical aspects of filmmaking. I can tell we are gonna be in for a long haul when it comes to learning the ropes with all of the gear we are expected to make use of this year. No more puncing around with mini-DV decks! Naturally I predict many a teary tantrum on my part, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it shall we.


In sum:
-Music can serve a variety of purposes in narrative, not the least common of which can be to act as a transition between shots.
-Sounds can be superficial (imaginary) or filmed on location (wild sounds)
-Silence can speak volumes (we watched a bit of footage from a movie where a rape scene was omitted and instead a clip of some wartime soldiers was inserted, whilst the characters continued to discuss the events - thus we were left to imagine what had happened, evoking a deeper sense of pathos than if we had just seen what these characters were speaking of)
-Dialogue is a key form of synch sound
-Music and sound-effects are known as non-diegetic
-You must choose wisely the location from which you record sounds
-Soundscapes provide good grounds for experimentation, particularly in reference to point of view (take Hitchcock's Rear Window, while Jeff is lying in bed)

Will write more once the readings are done, and will possibly comment on some more Hitchcockian use of sounds.

the million-dollar question

how to avoid being cliche in a postmodern world that continually rips itself off left, right and center?

from bad to worse

Okay, so now that you all know I'm a religious zealot when it comes to Home and Away, you're going to wet yourselves when you discover my little rainy-day fetish:

Crashing out on my beanbag watching Dawsons Creek DVDs.

Yes, I own all 6 seasons, including the finale.

No, you do not have permission to shoot me.

I don't see what's so bad about it anyway. I mean, a girl's gotta have a hobby, and if it's keeping me off the streets, why not...?


Is it wrong of me to idolise? :P

PS: Cold Feet is an close 2nd... Hey, at least I've got all bases covered! (Aussie/UK/US drama wise)

light reading

Pretty surprised by this week's readings. I guess when writing a script there is only so much you can say/do before getting back to basics. So far I've enjoyed the lectures, and kind of wish Di was in a position to stay on with us throughout the course. Her input and influence is going to be missed when she moves on.

Since it isn't quite off topic, I'd just like to take this moment to go off on a little tanty rant about the sad, downhill-headed state of one of Australia's most well-loved dramas: Home and Away.

Now, I've been a longeroom Summer Bay resident since the ripe old age of 9, so pardon me if this all sounds like it's hitting a little close to home. Every new season there are new credits, which are infinitely more annoying that the seasons' preceding. Not only this, there is a new style of filming/acting/construction that really only serves to make the show tedious and repetitive... I know, you're all thinking, 'but what else can be done with a drama that's been running for all those years?' - I'm not bagging out the plotline (although some of it in the past few seasons has been utter shite), but I have to say that as one of our main Aussie exports, the way this thing is put together nowadays doesn't do our name or country a lot of justice.

It really is said to see a show like this grow more formulaic and less suspenseful as the years pass. Why doesn't anyone have the guts to change the face of mainstream drama? We could all do with some sense of refreshment. As Alf Stewart would say, viewers are now copping the 'rough end of the pineapple', and the only thing I can attribute this to is a state of sheer complacency.

snippetts.. or teasers if you will

I find it curious that we are doing both 'drama' and 'documentary' this year when the latter is enduring quite a significant transition. I wrote a Media Ethics paper last year, relating Baudrillard's theme of seduction to the lucrative advent of 'Reality TV'. Also dubbed 'docu-drama', shows such as Big Brother have called the nature of the genres under question, raising a number of ethical questions along the way.

This is just the beginning of the essay. I'll be saving the rest for later on.


Perhaps the most seductive television format to emerge over the past decade is what can loosely be termed 'reality TV'. Programs such as Big Brother, Australian Idol, Survivor, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and The Block have continued to dominate network ratings both nationally and abroad. This mode of observational 'docu-drama', or fly-on-the-wall camera has arguably transformed the viewing style of millions (, playing on presumably different aspects of audience engagement than its 'fictional' predecessors. Most notably, the scriptwriters and actors we've come to know and love are finally eschewed in the process; in which the dramatic displacement of reality masquerades as a kind of voyeuristic 'entertainment', of other peoples (edited) lives (Davies 2000, pp37). Apart from sparking fierce debate about the changing nature of documentary, ethics has resurfaced as an arena for intense discussion - partly because the ethics of this new form - at first glance - appear questionable indeed (Armstrong 2005, pp73).

tips and tricks

Di really knows her stuff when it comes to defining the nitty gritty of character.

The way to getting to really know the in's, outs, strengths and weaknesses of your character is to put them through the mental ringer a few times over. That is, take them out of the context of the story - out them under pressure, gague their reactions to a vast milieu of social situations and predicaments. Will they cave when push comes to shove, or will they persist? What is the life-affirming message you wish to embed in your narrative... or is it even life-affirming?

You could even write a biography.

Di reccommended a good source of internal monologue/reflection, a book entitled 'You'll never eat lunch in this town again'. No better or more compelling way to get inside a persons' head than through a memoir.

Basically, you are not going to make progress with these characters if you aren't willing to get confrontational. This is often more or a challenge for the writer than the character in question. The key to writing colourful, evolved fiction is to dress up every situation to the nines, and work out exactly where their quirks of personality lie.

meditating on creativity

So the first chunk of this subject seems to be devoted to getting us to 'unleash the dragon' in relation to our creativity reserves.

Most of us are a little rusty in that department. Me especially.

According to Di, it's a writers' volition to tell the world about things. The innate desire to create, to reflect, is something we are driven to share with those around us. Whether it be to make a serious comment on humanity or poke fun at its foibles, the propensity to share that without is part of our cultural makeup. It's what truly helps us form our social identity.

Subtle tension, irony and conflict must be used to a maximum extent, particularly if the piece has been created to serve a greater moral precept. Noir, for example, is a narrative device used to elicit tension. Often, a set of technical formula is so ingrained within a specific genre but that it is indeed subconscious.

Of course, nothing exists in stasis - so these genre are continually evolving, growing. This is also relative to ever-changing values of the viewing audience, who as educated moviegoers are anything but a static, homogenous group.

Today, the sky is in fact the limit when it comes to putting a pen to paper and writing for cinema. Though there may not be a one-size-fits-all approach, the main thing is to relax with the medium and trust one's instincts. Then, and only then will filmmaking retain an element of unrelenting truth... no matter how fictitious the premise or story.

underwhelmed?

Am I the only person who finds the entire scriptwriting process completely underwhelming?

Maybe this is a testament to my boring personality, who knows. I used to be able to make up characters in my head faster than I could conceptualise what I'd just done. Is that the trick...? How do screenwriters manage to stay in that constant, child-like imaginary stasis... or at least, be able to call upon it whenever they like.

Maybe I am underrating myself. I know of a few stream-of-consciousness type exercises that can supposedly get the brain juices flowing. But it's the start of another long and daunting semester, and everytime I think about putting words onto paper my brain starts to freeze up.

Maybe the solution is anti-freeze? hmmm.

Mackendrick's reading this week purports that 'Movies SHOW.. and then TELL'. Films are supposed to be 60-80% comprehensible even if the dialogue is in another language. With this in mind, I'm having difficulty running over the ideas in my head in a way that would have them make sense without the spoken word.

I guess that's where one's ability to work with and adhere to production elements comes in.

Is this a confidence issue? Surely all of us who know how to properly read a film, know in the backs of our brains how to construct one to have it make sense to a viewing audience. I guess we'll find this out in later weeks. Until then... wracking my brains.

list pertaining to the art of moviegoing

Purely for my reference come script writing time:

popcorn
first dates
haunted
darkness
anticipation
storylines
social gathering
time out
french theatre
curtains
magic
communal dreaming
suspension of disbelief
composition
tension
conflict


Okay, so that's rather rough and disorderly.. but there's gotta be a pearler in there somewhere.

coming out, not copping out

I imagine the feeling I get when admitting out loud that I want to work in film is somewhat similar to coming out of the closet.

I hear that it's not uncommon for gay people to tell friends and family that they're 'bi' first, to ease them into the idea. Which is kind of what I've done in the past, except 'media rep' has always masked my true desire to become a filmmaker.

Well, I'm over it. I'm in my third year of my degree now and I've basically thrown caution to the wind, finally allowing the eternal filmgeek within me to surface without feeling an inexplicable need to silence it.

I guess it's more of an insecurity issue than anything else. The moment you define your destiny - everything changes... And the sheer, fickle competitiveness of the industry, especially within Australia, is enough to shoot down anyone's meagre hopes of big screen success. However, it has been pointed out to me that that alone is not a sufficient reason to abandon my life dreams altogether, and 'copping out' at this point would be perfectly inexcusable on those grounds.

So. 'Ere I am. Enrolled in TV1 and utterly, utterly in love with the content and everything to do with it. This blog is going to be pretty discursive - and, at times I expect, self-deprecating. I really want to make the most out of this course though. I mean, it's pretty much gonna suck if I fail...!